How much of what weighs you down, isn't yours to carry?

Updated: Mar 18, 2021

It took me a long time to understand this but when I did it was so much easier to let go of thought patterns and beliefs I'd been given from respected and older members of my family and also from society as a whole. I understood that a lot of of my thinking was based on generational fear and was planted the seed that above all else the most important thing to achieve in life is to create safety.

That meant that a lot of my conditioning from being a child consisted around fear based thinking and even lack based thinking to some degree.

My grandparents were children in the second world war. The lived in fear for most of their childhood, particularly the years that are most susceptible to conditioning between 0-7 years. To them safety and preservation was everything. People were in a position of loosing their loved ones either in battle or in the bomb strike at any point. Life was on a knife edge and they knew how easy it was for the gift of life to be taken away.

But that fear became ingrained in our culture for far longer than when the war ended.

That fear of loss was passed down the generations in our family and its those fears that have created the illusion of what safety is. For my family safety was to not try to stand out too much, so you are not rejected - you had to fit in to what was deemed socially acceptable, you had to be comfortable financially but you shouldn't make a living in a way that would make you stand out or be compared to others - like singing or art for example. You didn't want to be too successful, people will get jealous of you. So a constant dimming down of self in order to be accepted. There was also the under current of fear of death and that spread in to fears about flying, driving, hospitals etc. However that fear was driven from loss. My nan lost a brother in the war and at 52 my grand grandmother died, my nan was only 19 when she passed.

While my grandparents loved us all with everything they had. They gave everything of themselves for family but they also passed on generational trauma. Trauma of loss that became deep seeded. Trauma that made us stay in a place that fits your comfort zone, where its safe.

However as the third generation since the war its time to realise, our fear based thinking is keeping us stuck in perpetual cycles that encourage us not to challenge ourselves, to stay hidden, to set small goals, to not dream big. But its an illusion. Its a limiting mindset and your mindset can evolve, just as you can. You are what you decide to be and when we're not who we truly are for all the reasons listed above, we won't be happy and fulfilled until we embrace that and become comfortable with and accept ourselves for who we are. So we can get out of own way and stop playing small, we just need to give ourselves our own approval.

The fears of the past are no longer our generations burden, they are not ours to continue carrying. Its time to shed them and undo our limited thinking because there really is a world of possibilities not yet tapped in to. But we have to loose the nagging feeling of not feeling safe. That's a trick your mind plays on you, its a programmed response, just like breathing, your mind is conditioned to keep you safe. However, safe can also stop you from growing and keep you in your bubble and not upsetting the apple cart, just like trauma can. It took for me to identify what my limiting beliefs and fears were but then energy healing to fully understand and remove them from my energy.

I have a completely different view on life now, one of endless possibility because I don't have those fears and anxiety that were passed to me, swirling around my subconscious anymore and hampering all my perceptions and holding me back. They were never mine to carry in the first place and they are not ones I will continue to burden myself with or the next generation because life is short and I choose to live it happy and fulfilled, not stuck in the past and that is how you get out of your own way.

The Emosh Coach

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